Why Los Angeles does NOT need Pro Football

Ask most loyal Los Angelenos about the ‘glaring’ lack of professional football in town, and the response you get will be somewhere between ennui and malaise. . .the fact is, we have so much drama, so many storylines, and frankly such good programs (53 NFL players drafted out of USC since 2002, 23 NFL draftees from UCLA) that we really don’t need a squad.

The mumbo jumbo about the team in City of Industry is just that – another annual blusterfest by the local ‘magnates’ and wealthy big-shots that are hellbent on stealing a moribund franchise from their loyal fanbase (hint = http://www.nd.edu/~afreddos/images/Buffalo_Bills_Logo.gif), since expansion is most likely going to be international, if at all before the close of this current decade.

In the meantime, L.A. fans are more than content to watch the Lakers, Dodgers, Kings & yes, even the Clippers, all the while enjoying some of the most entertaining Gridiron drama in the Nation. Without further adieu,

L.A. Football Scene: The Players

Lane Kiffin – Currently, the star of the group – stepping right in for Uncle Pete and taking drawing media attention like matter to a Black Hole. A lightning rod nationally, Kiffin is the impetus for destruction & hatred in Knoxville to celebration & recruting coups in Watts.
http://losangelespublicrelations.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/lanekiffin-209x300.jpg

Norm Chow – the phenomenal coordinator (who somehow can’t land a head gig) has been a Guru for quarterbacks has become ingrained in a tug-of-war between Kiffin (who offers more $$$ and a stronger ‘program’) and Neuheisel (who can offer a beautiful campus & coeds, a superior academic institution and less controversy).

http://socalsportshub.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/300px-Norm-Chow-Cal-vs-UCLA-Oct-26-08-232x300.jpg

Rick Neuheisel – The incorrigably brash, kinetically energetic Neuheisel is all of a sudden the Dean of L.A. Football coaches. This morning, he was on The Dan Patrick Show saying his biggest regret about Carroll leaving was that he “wouldn’t get one more shot.” He’s actively pursuing recruits (including his own Norm Chow) and has this season to really dig his heels in and end the Football Monopoly in Los Angeles, OFFICIALLY.
http://img28.picoodle.com/img/img28/5/12/29/f_nueheisel12m_2c00741.jpg

Mike Garrett - The Trojans Athletic Director apparently had beef with Carroll prior to the controversy, hardly even speaking to his head coach (and Cash Cow) since the regular season finished. Regardless, he made a shrewd – if not desperate – hire with Kiffin, and this roll of the dice will probably determine his future. My favorite aspect of Garrett is his hubris and sheer reluctance to really speak to the media, kind of reminds you of another USC Heisman winner. . .
http://www.tributetotroy.com/wiki/images/c/c4/Mikegarrett.jpg

Dan Guerrero - the sharp, austere leader of the Bruin Athletic family, Guerrero has been remarkably quiet throughout. It’s not quite his place to speak up. . .yet. Rest assured, though – shall something happen with Chow, or shall Neuheisel not sustain the forward momentum of the UCLA program, heads WILL roll. Guerrero does not take kindly to mediocrity.

http://graphics.fansonly.com/photos/schools/ucla/sports/auto_action/a-guerrero.jpg

Monte Kiffin – can’t fault a supportive father. Also, can’t fault a son that respects his Dad to the extent that he won’t coach without him. Lastly, can’t fault any of Kiffin’s stout defenses.

http://www.huskerextra.com/content/articles/2009/07/03/football/doc4a495d3bcb5e5871855628.gif

Ed Orgeron - a monster recruiter, word was he hit the phones with Tennessee recruits quite literally the exact second that he left the Tennessee job. A tenacious personality, effective coach and part-time actor, he carries the presence and intimidation factor that USC needs yet again as they try to bully their way through the Pac-10.
http://cdn.bleacherreport.com/images_root/image_pictures/0079/4234/s21rebs_feature.jpg

Pete Carroll – and it all comes back to Uncle Pete. Dynamic, insidious, industrious, vivacious, unflappable, charasmatic and one HELLUVA football coach, this Los Angeles legend Bolted like Usain as soon as he saw Death (Penalty) around the corner. Can’t blame him – the skies of Seattle are gorgeous and the rain is more like mist, and their writers, though strong, tend to take a liking to hometown athletes. The fans are even more supportive.
http://media.oregonlive.com/nfl/photo/carrolljpg-ca0d4b496d8a08ef_large.jpg

That said, without Pete leaving, none of this takes place and Los Angeles truly is a Trojan Town, frankly as long as Pete wants it to be. . .but alas, the man jump shipped and here we are, with the entire nation talking about L.A. COLLEGE football, right during the professional football Playoffs.

Enjoy, L.A. Fans – you are blessed. And you still get the best games on Sundays without being tied to a dubious matchup.

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4 comments

  1. SON OF SAM

    FINALLY A FUCKIN INTERESTING TAKE FOR ONCE

    ALSO WHIPPING OUT THE VOCAB COCK ENNUI MALAISE MORIBUND AND THAT WAS ONLY IN THE FIRST TWO PARAGRAPHS THATLL BE 1.50 SON WHERED YOU LEARN ALL THOSE WORDS THOUGHT YOU WENT TO UCLA

    ALSO BULLSHIT IM NOT MORE THAN CONTENT TO WATCH THE FUCKIN KINGS HOCKEY SUCKS

    CARROLL IS A PIECE OF SHIT AND WILL FIND OUT WHAT ITS LIKE COACHING MEN AND NOT BRAINWASHED CHILDREN HE BRIBED TO COME PLAY FOR HIM WHEN HE GETS TO SEATTLE I HOPE HE CHOKES ON HIS GAY LATTE

  2. Big R Skanky

    A Little sappy on the UCLA side. If the program doesn’t move forward heads will roll. It has been stuck in the same place for 8 years. Death Penalty won’t save UCLA.. They are still 5 years behind. And Norm Chow stays for the coeds? Poor

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