Game 1: With a deep freeze enveloping the Yankee Stadium turf, the only thing colder than the Yankee Fans are the collective bats of the Phillies & Yanks. CC Sabathia and Cliff Lee engage in a Classic Duel that leaves both teams scrambling for last minute knocks. Bunts, baserunning and real baseball ensue, and the Yankees survive, 1-0.
Game 2: Pedro continues his somehow-under-the-radar excellent season (why didn’t the Dodgers go after him again? McCourt, Jamie – I’m looking at you) with a typically low-key, high-profile performance. Conquering his Yankee Stadium demons with one for the ages, the Phillies even the series 1-1 on the strength of Utley-Howard-Ibanez-Werth going back-to-back-to-back-to-back.
Game 3: Back in Philly, the riotous fans await their second consecutive opportunity to cause urban chaos. Cole Hamels instead turns out to be the reason for the chaos, getting shelled as Jeter & A-Rod get back into form with a combined seven-hit performance, leading to a 9-3 Yankees victory.
Game 4: The first day in National Sports History that all four major sports (hockey? really?) play games simultaneously is just too much for Cliff Lee to handle, as he inexplicably implodes on short rest, leading to a quick hook from Forrest Gump Manuel, and another Yankee win, 8-5.
Game 5: With the Yankees up 3 games to 1, Fox takes their control of the sport to the next level by actually contracting Cloud-Seeding airplanes to ensure that rain DOES fall from the sky, thus enabling their nefarious scheme to play games ‘only when not directly competing against football.’ The seeding helps, ensuring that the lowball ratings from Sunday are not duplicated on Monday. As the game resumes Tuesday, Manuel deftly uses an 11-pitcher combination to secure a Phillies victory, 6-5.
Game 6: Andy Pettitte once again proves to be the postseason hero, craftily fighting through some early trouble to escape with a 7-4 win. Mariano Rivera is once again on the mound as the clinching out is caught by A-Rod on a soft liner off the bat of Jimmy Rollins.
YANKEES IN 6 Games. Enjoy the World Series, folks – should be outstanding.